The Signs

These are just notes for myself.

November 16,2009 is the day of the new moon. I just so happens to browse on a site that let me know that today is a moon of new happenings. Just as I clicked on a Moon Phases site, I noticed a stink bug on the curtains in my house.

This is the message of the stink bug.These are insects in plant-disguise, animals with the appearance of a plant. Analogically you are a spiritual presence in human disguise, a species belonging to one of nature's realms but with the looks of another. you have the ability to go unnoticed, or, to move from one realm to the other.

As a totem these animals can teach you how to go about your own things without being hindered by the opinions of the outside world. An invitation to search inside for who you really are, and what talents you may have to develop.

So is the universe inviting me to understand my true self just a little bit more? Who am I? Why am I searching? I just bought a book by Carl Jung titled "Modern Man in search of a soul". Is the new moon the great energy to help me search for my immortal soul that I seek. :P

I also decide to look up the story of Marduk. There is a character on Tekken 6 named of Marduk that I played with just before researching this guy. How interesting everything unfolds from mere intuition and thoughts. What am I?

Mind Dive

I dove into my mind a little bit just to see what's going on. Why do I feel stressed even though I am living an ideal life right now. Hardly any stress, warm clothes, food, and shelter.

My bills are practically paid for just by working at this new job teaching English in Korea.

During the mind dive I focused on why I feel scattered. I tend to organize my thoughts and put them in to glass boxes and observe them. In the fun box I saw random things like going on adventures, playing video games, and drawing. I notice that these fun filled activities weren't finished though. The drawings had missing pieces and the video games weren't played to the last level. Yea, maybe my lack of grounded-ness and being mentally scattered is affecting some of my happiness for now, but it'll get better through time

Then I had a random thought session. I saw a glass with beads of water next to it. A fly was trying to get in but it couldn't. This fly wasn't an ordinary fly but it had sparkling wings. This visual only lasted for a few seconds.

I had another visual of being surrounded by several layers of glass. The room was completely white and empty but the sun was in the sky. I don't know why I was in this glass but the warmth of the sun kept me sane in that box.

Afterwards,I saw my self in a tiny room where the real grass covered the floor in a complete white room. I felt the soft grass under my feet while wearing pajamas pants. How comfortable!

So after analyzing my thoughts I feel confined a little but still feel warm inside. I know that the sun is always shinning and there is many new experiences out there for me. I may put myself in these see through glasses, they will easily break with a nice kick or punch. I will be ok, I've always been ok. I just have to place pleasant thoughts into my head. It's going to be a long winter.

I often wish a woman with a gorgeous voice would just sing to me and sing to me often.

That's all. It's not as poetic as I want it to be but I guess this will do. At least I am writing a little again. :D

Meditation Blog 1

Tonight I decided to meditate under the waning moon/full moon.

I sat out at the pier next to the sea. The sea sparkled into the horizon and the moon shined brightly. During my meditation or visions I asked for focus from my animal spirits,planets, and moon. I grounded to the earth and visualized protect
ion from the water spirits. Waves protected me from any spirits that would disturb me during this self-activation period.

Just before closing my eyes, a rooster crowed and it's voice could be heard miles away. Rooster's have been sending me messages the past two days lately.The call of the rooster let me know that I was at the right place at the right time.


What I saw as my eyes closed was a woman that recongnized as my spirit mother. She told was very beautiful and her body was outlined by the light of the moon and her eyes were without pupils.

She floated towards me from a pitch black place as her white hair dangled in the wind while and gave me a big hug. She told me that before I could start anything , was to know that I was loved. It was the most important thing before any thing else could take place.

She gently placed her arms around me and I cried on her shoulders and told her thanks. She told me that she was my true mother and she'd always be right beside me guiding me into the right directions. I could only cry during the visualization and feel the protection of being guided by my soul mother or moon lit mother.

That is all I needed and I was told to slow down, relax, and not to push myself. I've made it and there isn't anything to prove to anyone on this planet. I came to enjoy, relax, and be the artist that I am. To see what beautiful life I can develop during this time.

Later on she turned into a white tiger and then a dolphin. I am guessing these are the spirits that followed along beside her to guide me to my paradise.

The Noble, The White Haired Wise Clan.

I found this a little later.

Feel Alive

Today I feel really alive. My spiritual guides, animal guides,and everyone has sent me a lot of energy and guidance. It's very overwhelming but I do want to mark this day where I feel more at peace than I ever been before. :D

Adios,
Light