I suppose

Today was a good day! Kind of, I went out the house finally. I think this has been my second day in a row to step outside the cave I put myself in. I actually saw life for a while lol. I have not written in a while and I know that's not like me to write every 3 weeks or so. Wait that is like me? I have been pretty inconsistent with my blogs, but I have been neglecting my urges to write. Well here it goes

The movies of life has been the hot topic in my life.

I went to see the movie "Star Wars: The Clone Wars". I loved the Jedi Knights lol, I really think I should be one of them in real life. I know I am crazy, but who wouldn't want to be one. You can manipulate people's minds, using invisible force to crush people, have electricity shoot out your hands, and just jump all over the place defying gravity. That's what I am talking about!. I practice a lot of meditation and I see myself as a warrior in white with clear skin made of light filaments, perhaps that's my original origin.

I took a loook at some books today to, comic books on Star Wars and light meditation. There was a book on Remote Viewing, I think I am going to use my mediation settings for that, it had very useful tips on there. :). How enlightening, well I can imagine things, so we'll see what comes about. Hopefully I am disciplined to write down my thoughts and keep myself in Nirvana!

Yesterday I took a peak at "Atlantis: The Lost Empire". I am definitely one of them, they have an affinity for crystals and I have a large gathering of them in a wooden bowl. I should meditate more often, Lemuria is also a place I have probably spent some life times because I came across a site of the Blue-Ray children and it described me very well. It was a precise and to the point , but I know I am a warrior of light came to destroy some old belief systems that serve no purpose in the new world.

Slowly, but surely something new will occur on earth. Not sure what it's going to be but I am starting to feel it more and more these days.

Lately, I've also been hard on my job search ( not really). I tend to trick myself in believing I am trying to find a job long and hard but I've been totally unsuccessful lately. I mean what is truly out there for me, because I am always bored all the time with people and conversing with people that only associate themselves with money. I can't ignore them, because they would get on my nerves even more. I tend to worry about meaningless things, but oh well.

I miss my old life where I got to eat everything and paint. Go to the parks and museums anytime I wanted, where is that life again. Now that I am finding myself more and more these days, I feel that I am going to levitate soon. I am devoting three 20 minute sessions on meditation. Hopefully I'll stick to my regimen. I want to focus on getting out of my labyrinth, because crap keeps coming up keeping me in isolation. I am about tired of it, Saturn should be out of my sign soon, so hopefully things will lighten up after such a thing. Maybe I am not using it's energy wisely enough, but oh well. I made incredible changes, I am just looking for something fulfilling.

Well, this is all I will write, I feel better the more I write and talk about things that will better my future as a General or CEO of a company for large jelly beans lol. :D OK, I'm off to write random words in my small notebook. I love to write !!!! I am going to watch movies tomorrow to!!!. They are so great, well the ones that mean things, not that drama crap about love, screw that. Oh, and Ill raise my job search strength to .02 percent. I hate to work, maybe after I get a job, I can take a lucky girl out on a date finally lol.



Adios Samurais

Solar Eclipse Day (New Moon)

Sweet Misery - Amel Larrieux - song has nothing to do with what I am talking about but it's nice :D

Today is the day of the Solar Eclipse. New moon is today, so it's a super new beginning. I wish I was in the areas that are able to view it. There is suppose to be a lunar eclipse later on this month as well. I wonder what that means, because having two eclipses are suppose to have some deep spiritual meaning I think. I think it's time to soak up the energies that is provided by the moon presenting it's self in front of the sun.

My days are totally switched around. Instead of waking up at 7am. I wake up at 7pm now and go to bed around 11am. I decided to make that switch instinctively because I wanted to spend more time looking at the stars. Yesterday, I got a glimpse of a UFO. I know it wasn't a plane because it wasn't blinking. I laid in the grass gazing in the stars like I always do, and then suddenly I saw this "Star", or bright dot floating around. It started moving slowly like a plane and then moments later it became very bright and disappeared. A few minutes later I saw a plane in another part of the sky, but it was blinking and moving like a plane. So, that plane confirmed it , that I did not see an ordinary object in the sky. So, neat, I guess my veils are beginning to tear away.

Earlier, I saw a shooting star zoom across the sky. I made a wish upon it and hopefully it comes true. I love nighttime, that's when I feel most alive and relax. I am still incorporating the ideas of being a night dweller instead of moving through out the sun lit days. I get to see the sun rise as well, which is fulfilling to me. The sun wakes during the hours of the dragon, so that's neat! I walked, laid in the grass and just sat there letting my thoughts come together. I really don't do much anyway, because I love living the simple life. It's been 8 days since I wrote my last blog, and It only felt like it was yesterday.

Time is moving at an incredible rate. It's like how can this be without any warning, those that are aware of this. I wonder what they are doing in order to harness this new time speed. It doesn't make sense, but I am glad because I need to hurry up with my mission.

Today I ended up at Books-a-million and gazed across some comics. I took a glimpse at the Mariner, or something. A comic about the King of Atlantis. It was pretty interesting because I figured I had a couple of past lives in Atlantis which seemed very interesting, so I also took a look at you tube videos that spoke about Lemuria and Atlantis, I love those stories. True or not true, I like fantasy anyway. I believe it's true and whats going on in the world is so outdated and boring. War is totally over-rated lol. After that I decided to call on my spirit and imagined myself by the Orion's belt. I started hearing a voice in my head saying. " I am Kamara from distant realms". I know I am a writer and I am suppose to make up a lot of things, then I suddenly heard the sound of water. I didn't freak out though but it was very interesting.



Oh, I decided to apply to the Peace Corp. I am always helping everybody and their momma with problems instead of my own, so why not make my time useful and travel everywhere doing it where it's needed instead of giving my powers to people that drain the crap out of me. No more of that, I promise myself!! . I am single without any offsprings running around. At least I don't think I do lol, I just have myself to worry about. It'll be a good opportunity for a new challenge.I consider it a project to see what I am truely capable of when it comes to spreading love and wisdom, I can learn several languages while I am at it

. I hope they take me in. The only thing that would hold me back is my debt :(. It'll take forever for me to pay it off because of my attitude towards society, I don't want to work a meaningless job and that's all that I see currently. I am still in the releasing of the old beliefs process and it's taking a lot of time, jeez. I just want it to end already, but I figure you can't rush perfection haha.I figure traveling around the world helping people will provide me with enough inspiration to create stories, or perhaps help me with a high level position, who knows. Traveling will give myself a challenge and much recongnition which I need for myself. I am bound to be a bad ass in the future. The numbers says I am cool, with the Life path of 7 I also discovered I have master numbers in my numerology chart. 11 and 22 pops up all over the place. Everyone should google, numerology if your intersted.

Well, I am glad I wrote today, because I always feel good when I write and just let my fingers type away and away. I wonder what kind of thoughts the solar eclipse will bring today because it's wonderful to see those types of things in the sky. It's different, better than seeing rising gas prices in my opinion, or dramatic people worrying about silly things. :p

I have to write two essays for the Peacecorp. That should take like 2 minutes because I type super fast. I need something new and exciting in my life. Come new life, come to me now! I will be kind and generous.

The Lemuria Video I watched:

Misty Rain!!

DUnno who he is, but i like his theme!

Today was a very stormy day. I did not wake up until 3 pm today. The ascension process is very exhausting, becuase I have the feeling that I am not here in this world anymore but I am going to keep acting like it for the sake of my body. :P Thunderclaps, Lightning bolts, and monsoon like rains came pouring down on the city today. The earth is getting heavy, but she is cleansing herself at all times. It was actually kind of scary to because I kept waking up out my sleep, just incase a torando or something started whiz by, but I instantly casted protection around the house just so that stuff won't happen.


I had a desire to read my Computer Security book and a few others to help motivate me to protect myself and gain my personal power back. Yes, I compare computer security with personal security. Computers are just like humans, but a different expression. There are your spammers, hackers, and others that come into your life to take your resources, energy, spam you with a bunch of garbage just for their sake. In the end it doesn't help you at all, they are just unloading worthless crap on you just for their personal satisfication. I am developing a mental virus protection as I upgrade myself into new realms. I know exactly what to look out for and lately I've been locking down myself waiting for the right time to spring up again. My computer has been my savior for the past year and I am thankful for it. It allowed me to connect with like minded people that have helped me with my long process.! :D

So all day was kind of disturbing for a while, all the crying, the raining, and I met an Asshole that claimed to be a spiritual teacher. He tried to be-little me every time he got. One of the topic of discussion was about working out to increase my brain capacity. He told me working out has nothing to do with developing your IQ and brain capacity. I believe that It did, because it allows the blood flow to your brain to increase and maximizes energy. People can use this energy for anything, I choose it to read and think better.

People brought up IQ test, but I feel that those tests are man made. The ones that are running the country right now don't even have high IQ, the ones with the highest are more likely slaves of society, holding on to their scores ranting about how much smarter they are in comparison. I also, told him it was hard for me to mingle with people and he had the nerve to call me a People Hater, I am like what? So yea, although people claim they are spiritual teachers, does not mean they are of the highest good.That guy was just old and fat probably with a bald head, ugly, I don't blame him for being angry lol? He started going off on other people as well. I bet they know his true colors now, I some how can bring out the worst in people and the best. Lucky me!

Watch out for these false priests, even Popes try to get their freak on with little boys, which is sick but the parents of these children do not teach their kids any better :(. They need to learn to defend their bodies and not let some old wrinkled guy come onto them, its just plain gross!. The lesson I've learned is not to waste my time. I actually told the guy that he bored me and he kicked me out the chat lol. Some teacher, reminds of elementary school, I used to crack on all my teachers because they were boring. Yes, I am definitely a system buster, mainly because I don't give a damn about a lot of things. I am just glad to be alive and I'll work myself around situations using my mind without fear or doubt. The universe always lines it's self up for the best.

I don't claim myself to be this ultimate holy person either, I don't need to be, I am not trying to be a priest, I just like to say whats on my mind whether it's right or wrong. I'll learn! XD. Yea, it was a troublesome day, my friend is sad because she did not graduate in 4 years, she will be graduating in six instead. She kept changing her major and became frustrated. I feel that we don't know what we wanna do with our lives because society has changed so much, there is no way someone can do one thing for the rest of their lives. It's been done in the past but the revolution is here. Multi-tasking at it's finest."Oh, I just saw an orb". I gave her my personal healing session, by explaining that she has done hard work and don't cast what she has learned in the past. She can be a power house in the future with all the skills that she has learned. I feel that a degree is a piece of paper and it doesn't define anyone, an object that is more or less a personal booster letting society know your seirous and motivated about yo STUFF! . School is boring as hell though.

I don't want this to be a long blog. But it was sort of a gloomy day and I played Guild Wars today which was a lot of fun. My D/Me is now a level 15 power house , he jumped 4 levels in the past two days I think? I am not sure, but it's mainly about skills in that game anyway. It's just a lot of fun to have tons of energy and health so that I won't die so easily. Dying is lame! lol Living is great! Only if your hanging with the right crowd, because people make life miserable and I honestly feel that you can catch cancer by just looking at those types of people lol. :P That's just me, I am sensative like that. I only desire to hang out with the cool kids, the litte people are the ones that believe that they are living just to die. The cool ones don't worry about age, dying, and finding there isn't anything to do. You find those people aging a lot less than most.

Here is my Character from Guild Wars!!! (I have two actually, but I'll post him later)

Full Moon Tonight

It's a full moon tonight, how lovely is that for such a passionate person of the moon. I just came outside from soaking in the moonlight and set down my stones,my jug of water, and placed my feet on the ground to absorb the lunar light fragments sprinkled all over the place. Now I have re-energized crystals and a jug of water that has been hit by the lunar flames of the night. I spent roughly an hour outside just thinking about the up and coming month and reflecting on the previous accomplishments since the last full moon. I was fascinated by the accomplishments but I still have much to release.

The obstacles I still have to over come are the issues I hold inside about my ideas of my family. I have charge up my root and sacral chakra because they are closed. I took this chakra test and that assured me that I needed to do something about it. I started meditating with my red and orange stones and eating orange food such as carrots. My meditation was geared towards charging my chakras with red and orange light. I already do some heavy physical exercises so, that didn't but instead of running I began to walk. Walking allows me to stay in my body and feel my legs picking up off the ground and move. I began taking hot baths and feeling my body as I lay in the water, massaging my legs and feet with baby oil. It's soothing. I just feel that I have to come back to reality, my higher chakras are and harmonized, however without a strong foundation there isn't much hope for survival. The root chakra is the base of survival and fearlessness. I am that of a fearless warrior but going through the ascension process I had to release a lot of things so suddenly which hampered them chakras so much.




Right now I am surrendering to my spirit and letting go all the contracts I have with anything. I am relying on my own sources for power and wisdom of how to do this. The images that come up in my head is being by water, owning my own apartment, with Internet and begin making money by selling my creativity. I love to write stories and what not, so this month I am going to set it all up. I have my pay pal account finally set up to make money, I am thankful for Joseph for his guidance to help me make that happen. Without him I'd probably still rant and rave about why having a job is meaningless. I am working though, just not in this reality, I believe I am hanging out in higher realms because I don't even get the T.V. anymore the television urks me , time is moving a lot faster, so I just have to keep up.

On top of that I was reading my ascension book and I cleansing my soul through deep meditation. 20 mins feel like 2 minutes now the better I get at it. all I do is focus on breathe and white light. Sometimes when I wanna focus on love, I used past relationships to help with that aspect. I've shown and received lots of love with plenty of women, but sometimes I rejected it because I felt unworthy, now I don't have to feel unworthy. Society teaches us this and it's really not a good thing if you want to obtain personal truth.

Today, I ate a crap load of cookie dough, don't worry I had health foods all day. Cookie Dough is my addiction, but I rarely have it now since I don't have my own source of income at the moment, but when it happens I will have a fridge full of it, but not to much I don't want to lose my "Six-PAC". My light is becoming more powerful though, the better music i listen to the more orbs I see during those moments. It's fascinating although I only see them for a half a second ,it's fun to see these bright little buggers light up randomly out the side of my eye. I just want to see them permanently and be able to ask them questions. I feel my guides at time resting on my right arm. Like they are trying to get my attention.


There is one thing that bugs me is that my family especially my mom and sister, wants me to retire them and buy them a house. If I don't they call me selfish. :( Why did that do that to me? Did I allow this because society tells me family first no matter what. If i asked them for a house, a car, even other fancy things, they will close up their purse and say get a job. So no, sorry, I chose my life to be free. They even tell me that since I don't have kids I should be able to do this. That's very lame, who teaches these people to say such things. I never had that belief even though I was raised in the same environment as them. I just believe I am a lone wolf trying to make a living. My spirit wanted to stop pursuing goals just so I want become wealthy and feel obligated to provide these things for the family. Now I say screw it, they can bust their ass and work hard to gain their own fortunes and I can have mine things. I created my reality, but I was easily influenced by the concept of family staying together, but with their thoughts I beg to differ and no one should have to put up with it. "As if it were a blessing that I didn't have kids, I used condoms really and acted responsibly in the bed that's pretty much it. No condom, No sex, no kids" I don't figure that's to hard but oh well. Now I want my G-35 , spacious apartment, work desk, living by the beach and I won't let the economy stand in my way. Well enough of that, the Moon and my higher self will grant my wish.

Every full moon I set my intentions on bettering my life. Right now I want to focus on the forgiveness aspects. It's easy for me to tuck things away and forgive easily, but right now I refuse to forgive people who be little me at times, but I want to release that. I am the source of my own power and I do not need anyone telling me how to live my life. I can take suggestions, but its up to me to accept it or not. However, I do attract a lot of people without having to say a word, mainly its because of my physical body, I presume. Being 6'4 and willing to smile at anything and everything shoots of invitations, my teacher told me to work on that lol. So here is the list I am making, by the NEW MOON I am going to double check what I have done.

-Learn Forgiveness and Forgive myself and those that have abused me, hurt me, intentionally or unintentionally.

-Charge my root chakra and sacral through meditation and physical exercises, allowing my creativity to flourish

- Focusing on creating and abundant cash flow so that I can become independently wealthy, because I deserve it, my spirit urges for it.

-Working with my gifts and energy manipulation

-Releasing attachments and psychic contracts ( ALL OF THEM)

-Enjoying fun and games; allowing my self to relax every once in a while.

Well I don't want to make work load to much, the above list is a lot of work for me and everyday is a chance to create an abundant future. Because I deserve it. DAMN IT!

Here is a favorite video game song that I like

Wolverine's Theme ; Street Fighter Vs. X-Men

Journey Towards to FOOD

I wanted to write on this fine night to help me with my journey towards greatness. I don't really have a formal quote or anything to write, but we'll see what comes out of my mind as I write. I usually have pictures on my site, but this crazy webpage is not letting me load any!!

I went grocery shopping today with my roommate. We finally was able to afford food, we decided that we wanted to continue to exist here on planet earth. Instead of buying gas and paying for bills, we were taught in science class that food is energy and we need it. I guess we want to live a little bit longer for now. I actually don't pay for anything, as I transition into Independence, I just need someone to take care of me through my ascension process. People will think I am crazy if I went out into the real world now. But I am not, I do believe in Aliens and washing my hands before I eat ! :) My roommate and I created wonders out of 20 dollars, its a lesson of conservation. I think we passed. Although we brought $21.20 worth of food. ( DAMN TAXES). I am a perfectionist so I was a little upset that I didn't calculate that in, oh well. We have Turkey Bologna to make up for it.

After grocery shopping ,we headed to the dollar Theatre, Actually the movies cost $2.50 on the weekends. :( Why do they call it the dollar movie theatre if the ticket prices aren't a dollar all the time. False Advertisement!!!. Oh well, it was a pretty nice theatre. I missed out on a lot of movies during my transition and I was finally able to see Forbidden Kingdom. I want to be a Traveling Monk now.I want to go on an enchanted journey and become an immortal. So I can conquer worlds and enjoy new sites. The world is such a dull place sometimes. I think the Internet is the best world I've seen so far. What a magical movie that was!. . Owning a big house and fancy cars seems boring. I want to own my powers and manipulate the people that create M&M's so they can deliver free bags of M&M's everyday to my door step. The force is with me !!! But it is a fun movie. I recommend it to anyone. The kid reminds me of myself, I've always had a passion for martial arts and fighting. It's very fun to participate. My favorite PlayStation games are Street Fighter, SNK, Samurai Showdown, and Fatal Fury.

So I think in a couple of my past lives I was a magical fighter of some sorts. Probably was hired to protect, since I like protecting people in and guiding people in this life time. Well actually I quit that, because people don't want help anymore these days. I just hate seeing people destroy themselves over nothing. Oh well, I was told I am only responsible for myself. I am just here to think positive and do whatever I want. Especially since I have the ability to see orbs at random. These bright lights are kind of nice, but they flash at random times.

Martial Arts has been a passion of mine ever since I was a kid. I practice Tae Kwando and received a red belt before moving away into a far distant town. Into hell actually, but that's another story. I was a bad ass, and won 3rd place in my first ever tournament. I didn't do all the yelling, I just focused my energy on my feet. I was pretty strong as well, I remember kicking this one guy through the pad and he had to go throw up or something. I wonder what kind of damage I can do now. I'll probably kick down a couple of trees tomorrow to find out how powerful I am, maybe I lost it. I won't know until I find out. I did read in a Samurai Philosophy that games are a waste of time and a noble man is the one that trains, studies, and trains some more. A leader always has to look good because people will look up to him and follow his noble ways.

I kind of want to watch a bunch of martial arts films today. I played a little Guild Wars finally, I wanted to kind of take myself out this world for a while, and help focus on journeys and quests in the games. It will help me with this life as well. People think games are a joke, but they are actually quite useful, just depends on the games you play. So Guild WARS is not a game haha. There is life and death there, of course there is a restart button but still. The game tallies up the amount of death one has. So that's pretty meaningful, no real funerals but its still sad, seeing your man defeated by goblins that just zapped you with lightning and summon a dead army of flies . Oh well, I think this will be good for me anyway. I've been in serious mode these past days and really not getting anything done. My animal Tarot, told me I need to play a little more and start taking life a lot less seriously. I suppose, but I figured I had to break out of some mental patterns that keep holding me back some how. I am better now.


Damn, I write a lot; I apologize, but oh well. Tomorrow I am going to dive into creating articles and start making some money, so that I can finally buy food! I seriously only live to buy food. I think I am a good writer. I don't have any money on me now and the only way out for me is to write. Gas prices is ridiculously high and I have to use my resources. Which is my laptop, the Internet, and my skills. I have tons of education, I felt that I disrespected myself because I was settling for these low dead end jobs. I am a freaking genius and I can't be messing with small time stuff anymore. I don't have any formal experience, but I know I can do any job I set my sites on. Most jobs are pretty boring, I don't know how many people are bored with their jobs, they get paid to be in jail is how I see it lol. When I find out my worth I will on top of the world. I dissaprove of being bored. Everyday is a learning process anyway, the Internet and library has tons of information on every subject. I in fact picked up a website design page because I want to start bringing more star seeds together. It's fun to create. I also want to create my own free-lance writing web page. Hopefully that'll work out. I want to save money so I can buy a boat and live on it for all eternity. Row my butt to the Bermuda Triangle and check out the scenery, hopefully I'll disappear haha. Well this is enough for today. !!!!! I write to much!!

Scattered Thoughts, Scattered Memories :( Sad there aren't any pictures :(

Late, Late Night Blog

Late, Late, Night Blog.

Today was pretty interesting and fulfilling. I suppose I am just taking it one day at a time right now releasing the old and coming into my own slowly but surely. I am removing a lot of the blocks that I have inside. I went off on Jennifer yesterday because she touched some touchy subjects, but she will never understand. I think I need understanding people right now and no one telling me whose responsibility is what? I know I am responsible for myself and for me to analyze something Ill need to express about it to someone that understands. Fortunately, I picked up a book about security so that I won’t let just anything into my life or into my computer. I will review it tomorrow.

I started off my day by waking up around 2pm. I don’t know why I woke up so damn late, but I was tired. I guess it was from chatting with Kauket the whole night. Kauket is a woman I met on the awakenings site and she is a Pisces Dragon that has a lot of the same interests as me. Very nice, not really a girl I’d go for physically, but she is mentally there. She wants to become an animal trainer and that’s hot. I want to become a dolphin trainer for a while. But who knows, I change my mind every three seconds, but I’ll make it somehow. Umm, she is very open, light hearted, loves to laugh, and give me hugs through the internet. I find it fantastic that she is such a bouncy girl. She loves Egyptian, Japanese, and other types of culture just like me. Umm, we’ll see how it goes, my higher self is only going to attract what and who is best for me. I still have to pay attention to what’s in my heart because I deserve the best. Especially in the physical realm, I will just have to do what I like and the money will follow.

After waking up, I ate some hot dogs, watermelon and drank a cup of ice water. It was very tasty and a pleasant moment. I think the best times in my life are when I am eating food because I am giving to myself and no one else. I’ve been doing that most of my life without any acknowledgment but it won’t happen again though. I just have to find out what’s best for me so I can do my best in this lifetime. Ok, I am always diving into something else besides the main topic of my stories. After eating, I meditated for a while and focused on breathe, showered, and made up the bed. I didn’t read that much but Kandace and I ended up going to the library for a while until around 9pm.

I ended up checking out Haiku’s and Japanese housing. I really will get a Japanese house and Japanese everything. I really love that culture and I want the best for myself and no one else. I don’t see why people see it as being self-fish, but the stronger and more independent I get the better I am. I always think of giving myself to do things for free. I forget I have a college degree and I don’t need to do anything for free. All that damn education and I am here just moping around, I have tons of work to do for the better. I won’t just allow anyone to just control me and boss me around with their unintelligent minds. I do sometimes, ask people to think for me, but I am always used helping others I just don’t remember how to give to myself which is horrible but oh well. I am learning and will continue to learn because I am doing not feel guilt. “THIS CANDLE SMELLS DELICIOUS”.

I explored the library and looked at books about Photoshop C2, Web Design, Computer Security, Internet Security and other things like that. I only checked out the Web Design and Internet Security with my temporary Library Card. Oh, yea I am going to receive one in the mail and that will be fun after I get it. I am going to load my computer with a bunch of songs. I still have more to download as well. I also looked into Runner’s Magazine, Traveler’s Magazine, The Writers Magazine so that I can gain some writer’s tip. It was the August Issue and that means August is just right around the corner. I better start writing some articles, before I am dying of starvation. I was attracted to this Song writing book but I couldn’t check it out because it’s not that important. The library became my sanctuary and there is nothing that will take me away from it. Computer access, all you can read information, and lots, lots more. Kandace checked out a bunch of Cd’s to download onto her computer. As long as she doesn’t try to sell them, I think its ok with her. I have torrent spy and MP3 Rocket.

We finally arrived home after a thunderstorm hit. I am such a scary cat when It comes to lightning. I spontaneously ran to the Kandace’s car but she wouldn’t run to let me in. I don’t know why I have such a phobia when it comes to lightning, but I do. I only like them when I am indoors or something. After arriving home, I lit some candles, meditated for a while and then cooked some chicken, rice, and green beans. I did a very good job. After that, I just pretty much backed up music, photos, and documents on just incase this thing goes wild or something. But I am going to prevent it from doing such a thing and do my best to maintain it’s decency. Today was a fulfilling day, and now I am going to focus on the things I truly love and stop taking myself from that. I love very unique things and I shouldn’t be ashamed of it. Why, do I try to fit in? I am not sure. Oh I need to write a journal entry about why I am so damn angry. Lol. I really am an angry little rat but that’s fine. Sometimes, I say I am going to do things and don’t do them, that what frustrates me the most I suppose. I am just going to have to get better at this self-disciplined. But my days are always filled with information gathering. I just need people to fund it. I forget that I have to give back to the world, but there is always time to start it.

I don’t even know what I am going to do tomorrow. But I’m sure it’s going to be fulfilling. AHH!!! I have to start experiencing things instead of just whizzing by it or I am not going to get anything done. It’ll be nice and fantastic once I am able to achieve this. I do things pretty quickly, so it’s not going to be that bad. Thesauruses are wonderful books and I know that I will be able to make successful poems once I am able to achieve self mastery. I oughta work on my crystals tomorrow or something. Meditate into them and write down my thoughts with my amazing pens and pencils. :D

Good JOB Sixth Moon!

Good Work Jamaal!!!. I am congratulating myself because I woke up around 8:30 a.m. today just like yesterday. I went to be around 11:30 pm., I picked those hours to go to sleep and wake up because I’ve read in a Fung Shui book that if you go to sleep during the hour of the RAT (11pm-1pm) You are more than likely to get a better nights rest and your cells will rejuvenate a lot faster during those hours. The hour of the dragon is between 7 am – 9am, during that hour I meditate, stretch, and gather some of that early morning energies from the Dragon. So far It’s been very fulfilling and I am proud of myself for becoming more self-discipline as I unravel myself from the negative thoughts that are holding me down. I deserve a change for the better and I will do the best I can with this.

Last night before I went to sleep, I read a little booklette about the 7 days mental diet. I am supposed to keep track of my thoughts and never dwell on negative thoughts, or I will have to start over. That means anyone that creates the disturbance in the force for 7 days will go unacknowledged, I am pretty self-defeating at times and hold myself back a lot from thinking to much so other people adding to that equation will be set on fire in my mind. But I possess so much talent; if I let it go to waste by thinking crappy all the time, this life time will have been a waste.


Yesterday I went to the library and read on some good materials and browsed through a few model webpage’s, writer’s information, and other things that were useful. My location is inhibiting from shinning, so if I am able to find another location to thrive off of, Ill is sure to use my talents wisely. The first and most important step is to develop a healthy schedule, because I banned myself from the T.V. because as I ascend it gets harder to watch these days. There is a bunch of garbage going on, so lately, I’ve been writing poems, running, reading, and stretching, enjoying nature to enjoy my time. I am developing a dialogue with my spiritual guide name Molt Wood; he is supposed to be my highest guide. So, I chatted with him a couple of times and he is pretty funny at times, it’s either my imagination or him. Its fun none the less; there is just a so many surprises in life. He yells at me when I get down on myself, it’s hard being a Virgo at times. But from what I was told we are suppose to run the world!

What shall I do today? Oh I decided to go into writing and modeling. I am gifted in both and will try my best to be acknowledged for my diverse mind which I feel is far different from a lot of folks. I really don’t call myself a southerner although I lived here for the majority of my life; I’ve traveled to many places and haven’t spoken to anyone in the south about deep subjects. The main topic is weed or black suppression, something useless like that. So if the southerners I’ve spoken with aren’t going to provide me with any mind stimulation, books and magazines will. Speaking of books, I’ve read this therapy book for writers. I have to start taking myself seriously as a writer and appreciate my works because they are going to change the world someday. As a child I was never really able to express myself because loud people that talks about nothing like to talk over me. That is why I learned to tap really fast, and involved myself in strategic gaming. Now I am able to read the dictionary as freely as I want to learn new words and develop my vocabulary. I like keeping things simple by letting the words flow peacefully.

Since I am on this keeping positive diet, I have to stay focused on the music I like, and constantly play music, search for employment that I like and no one else. I have to stay in-tuned with my Anime, Crystals, Nature, Beauty, and everything that makes me smile at all times. If not they aren’t needed in my life, because all that matters is my well-being during this time. Video games really clear my mind and things that’s smell good as well. The Orcas, Oceans, Sea Creatures, Dolphins, and Acoustic Guitars, Japanese culture, Samurais, Philosophy, and beautiful women with nicely shaped bodies. I am a quiet guy that really doesn’t like to speak much unless something sparks my interest. Usually it has to be about space and astronomy I look at anyone peacefully. Mangas are my favorite, especially the ones about games because the kids on there are trying to get stronger and help out their friends. That is wonderful to me; I have been a lone wolf for a while now. Even though I have friends that helped me, I am able to just take some of their thoughts and leave the rest. I don’t think anyone can handle the full me, because I am very passive and when someone shows an ounce of weakness. I just don’t bother with them anymore I suppose.


Astrology and Chinese zodiac is pretty amazing to me, Tarot cards, Pendulums, Shamanism, Buddhism, anything that involves taking your shoes off and putting my toes in between sand, viewing the ocean is the best. Traveling has been my biggest thing, although I travel a lot more mentally than physically. Soon I will have both since my positive thoughts will dwell upon being free. My moon will protect me, speaking of moon, I think it’s a new moon either today or tomorrow so I am going to get some creative energies. I am going to have to write my thoughts about the future today or tomorrow and create a poem or two about it. That would be fun.


The highlight of this little blog, journal entry, or whatever is about thinking positive and I have to track it. When I write, I track it better which will make me an abundant person filled with attractive things. If people are dwelling on the negative, all I have to do is become a silent observer and do not have to accept what they are saying. I am great at observing, so people need to watch out what they say around me or it can backfire. I am sensitive to sound, smell, touch, and site.

My animal guide for today is a Porcupine and its message is telling me!!!

“Porcupine has appeared in your reading today to bring a message of innocence and trust. Although Porcupine can throw quills when cornered, he is gentle, loving, and non-aggressive. Is there an area of your life that need Porcupine energy? Have you lost the ability to trust?

Yes, I have lost the ability to trust. I hardly trust my family with any information how I can trust strangers out there unless I pay them. That is why I blog, I trust that I am getting through to people to help express how they feel. I am full of expression and not even getting paid for it. But people are going through all kinds of garbage in their lives. I seem to be the only one that likes to submerge myself in knowledge and wisdom, while staying physically active everyday. Putting nothing but great food into my body that will allow me to grow into new levels, I guess people like me are pretty rare. Where are you guys?! Oh well, they will come if I think about it. Soon I will be able to learn from the great masters about how to gather energy from cosmic levels instead of having to eat. That’s it for today, laptop battery is dying. !”OH NO!”. I am going to read a book about conquering the world with size 13’s.